Oh sweetie. Oh Sweetie. I’m so sorry. I know that feeling. The first time I felt it (a girl I was close with answered the phone at my not so recent ex’s apt - it was obvious) I knew I wasn’t heartbroken… after all, he’d already broken it. But there it was anyway, in what I’d managed to piece back together there was a new crack. There’s a chance that the crack is easier to suffer but it is degrees of hideousness nonetheless. I’m sorry. And all I can tell you is this, when we find Karl & Al, they’ll be all the sweeter for not being the heart-cracking asshats we’re used to.

I promise

I gave up internet stalking about six months ago for similar reasons. Why do you think I canceled my MySpace account? Because I don’t do well with temptation. And trust me - I don’t miss it at all.

Yeah, probably a good idea to stop with the unnecessary Googling. Poor gal.

Ditto with Lori…it’s the exact reason why I too canceled my Myspace account. It just made me crazy & I would rather get to know people the old fashioned way - by talking!

Chin up!! Go to Target…Target makes everything better.

In favor of Internet stalking…

I had an ex-girlfriend who burned me rather badly many years ago. Only quite recently, through the magic of Google, did I learn that her post-college life ended up pretty lame. She was brilliant and funny, and her future seemed to shine with infinite promise. Instead, she had a breakdown, and ended up living in Fresno of all places, married to a loser with a chronic employment problem.

When I compare her lot to the pleasant life my wife and I lead–adequate money, smart and funny friends, and international travel–I feel very smug, indeed. In a different era, I would have given my left arm to share a future like this with her.

I heart you, Internet.

Hi superjux

Every one of us has been there before and every one of us knows the right thing to do. but as you say, it is a bizarre way of pouring pain on top of pain, or reopening something emotionally painful that was closed years ago.

Why we do it, I have no idea, and sometimes I really do wish we lived in an internet-less age.

Thanks for posting about it and bringing it to the fore. I love your blog and always enjoy reading your posts. Don’t ever stop : )

Take good care.

Ignorance really is bliss, huh?

I’m sorry that your findings made you feel so crappy, but this shall pass. You know that.

“Because really, I think today put me in a place emotionally that I’d rather not visit again.”

It seems that most people keep going back to that place over & over once they find a piece of their past.

Just one more piece of evidence of your excellent mental health!

I think googling the ex’s is in the water right now. I think what spawned mine was I accidently included mine on a mass email and found he’d cancelled his email account he said he NEVER would give up in a million years as it was the one he’d had since he was 18 (ten years or so) so of course I was all GOOGLE AHOY.

I didn’t find much but I still felt gross about doing it.

I’m sorry you feel crappy about it

Oh that sucks.I’m sorry. But it will pass.

Even when it’s an ex you never really wanted to end up with, it still hurts. Amazing how that works!

I’ve turned down friend requests from exes. they can google me all they want but there’s no need for actual connections and communication. the exes I’m still in touch with are friends and always will be. I’ve even set one up with a close friend and they’re going on 2 years. the only ones I google are from way back in college and I’d love to see them married and happy. but then again, none of them are an Ex with a capital E, although a few felt like it at the time. time heals…

***Hug***

I’m sorry. It sucks and I’m sorry.

I went to that place today. Hadn’t been there for quite some time. Forgot how painful it was.

Say these words to yourself:

- You are special!
- You are somebody!
- There is a special guy just for you and it’s just around the corner.

How’s that for a Tony Robbins impression?

As a Scrabble fanatic, I know there are ways to play the game without the evils/temptations of FaceBook. There’s a download to play the offical game online, and better yet, there are Scrabble clubs in W. Hwd, and I went to the one in W. LA. Yes, it’s ubergeeky, but at least it’s face-to-face contact w/people, as opposed to interacting through a computer screen.

Oh, boo-hoo! Someone I rejected is happy and I’m still alone so I’m upset.

You poor thing.

“OK that’s not true, I once saw his wedding pictures. No, his wife isn’t pretty. And he was chubby.”

Do you ever think the incredibly judgmental comments like this are the reason you’re still single? No, that couldn’t be it, could it?

Sure, seeing that stuff written so starkly out there is painful. But it doesn’t necessarily tell the whole story. One friend of mine had “very married” on a profile where it asked for marital status. Well, her marriage had been in trouble from the get-go and they are now divorced.

OH — you sound so sad. So…no more google for you. Just some chocolate

Isn’t it weird how curious we are about those past relationships?? So strange…

Ah, the old ex internet-stalking. It NEVER goes well. I’m a big Ignorance Is Bliss fan in this case — I just assume they’re miserable with out me.