Oh, sweetie! Hang in there. I hope you have a wonderful weekend and do lots of fun stuff, because you deserve it. And we already have plans for a good bit of girl fun in July. We’re here for you, even when we’re out of town…

Yep, sorry about that H. Look for the humans, at least they’re a bit more interesting. Well most of the time. Other than that I’d recommend a good dog. Cheers & Good Luck! ‘VJ’

I wish I could be there for you. I know I’m not on that special girlfriend list, but my thoughts are with you. I’ll be back Sunday afternoon if you need dessert or coffee or something.

I know exactly how you feel! But the good news is … he was your frog. In a few months you’ll look back and be so glad you didn’t marry him!

Didn’t you reject him? Should he have waited around for you?

Hang in there. He wasn’t the right guy for you. You know that in your heart, your head will catch up soon.

Question: Yes, it was my decision to end the relationship. No, he shouldn’t have waited around for me.

But…that doesn’t mean it isn’t still bittersweet.

I’m not surprised that something like that would be shocking. ((((((Hil)))))) Hugs for you!

Somewhere in the archives of the blogger formerly known as Annabel__Lee, there’s a “what if” post about her college boyfriend. It involves Seattle and rain and crying and divorce. Now might be a good time to search it out and read it.

Have a wonderful weekend in spite of the mating habits of amphibious crustaceans.

Seems like this is a good time to bake something! Or if you prefer cooking, I think Cuisses de Grenouille au Beurre de Cresson would be perfect. Chin up H. would you really want a guy who calls his ex to tell her he’s getting married?

nothing ails a broken heart like an exploration of jewish identity through video, photography and multimedia projects…maybe we can even hit up the exhibition on darfur genocide! I kid, but looking forward to the skirball tomorrow. and maybe a few hours at the museum will help take your mind off. perhaps we should include some fatty food indulgence in the plan as well.

Of course it stinks. You didn’t want him, but it’s sad that he’s found someone. Be sad. It’s okay to be sad. Been there. Some days I am there. I’m sure my exes all have husbands too. Or wives [mmm]. Oops. Where was I?

Your lobster is out there. When you meet him, you’ll know why this frog wasn’t for you. There are other people in your life to meet up with this weekend. But if you’re home, pop “The Princess Bride” in the DVD player. It’ll cheer you up.

Isn’t lobster unkosher anyways?

I finally found and married my lobster. However, I know that I will be sad when I find out that 2 of my frogs (just 2, I am over the rest) meet and marry their lobsters.

You’ll get through, there’s nothing some ice cream and good movies can’t fix.

That’s hard. I know that when/if I find out that my most significant frog is married, or getting married, I will feel a bit sad and nostalgic, even though it’s been almost 7 years. You have a lobster out there, and when you meet him and smell lobster, you will breathe a sigh of relief that you didn’t convince yourself that your frog was actually your lobster.

The Princess Bride isn’t bad, but my vote is for When Harry Met Sally. The Ex is Joe, the soon-to-be-found Lobster is Harry, and in the end you’ll be sitting on a couch next to your Lobster talking about your coconut wedding cake with chocolate sauce on the side. The Ex will be the farthest thing from your mind. (And this, I know, will happen for you, as it does for all extremely cool and worthwhile people who want it.)

Until then, take solace in a good flick. And maybe some homemade Oreo cookies.

Thanks eveyone! I’m feeling a lot better after spending the evening with a friend then getting a good night’s sleep for a change. Plus, I don’t think there are any tears left to cry…I’ve used up the year’s allotment.

i completely relate-just a few months ago, i found out that my ex, the one who everyone expected me to marry, had not only moved on, but he had gotten married to another woman. it just so threw me for a loop…if i truly did the right thing by ending things because we had grown apart, and there were better things out there for me, why wasn’t i married before him? hang in there. (im still trying to!)

I think I can understand how you feel. I want the boy I am with now to be my lobster but i dont think its going to work out that way because hes going off to law school. etc. and if i ever hear he married someone else, i think id be pretty devistated.

im glad you have lots of good friends around you!

Glad to hear you’re feeling a little better; I’ve so been there. Be confident in the knowledge that Frog will experience a twinge when *you* find *your* lobster (my happily married friends definitely twinge when their exes find love). It’s just how we are wired.

oh my god! sweetie! i just got back and i wish you would have called me! i know how you feel, but it will pass. he is your ex for a reason and you are an amazing person and you have alot of people who love you…

My ex…married one of my good friends from college, a sorority sister, and the night they realized they wanted to date? Was my little brothers wedding.

Ah, what a story!

Tis always bittersweet and doesn’t matter if you are the one who ended it or not…at least from my experience.

*Hugs*

Even in another country, I’m only a phonecall away. But do yourself a favor: don’t watch When Harry Met Sally. Funny, sure, but also designed to make us feel like losers for not having opened our eyes to our best friends. De-press-ing-ola.

discovered your blog a while ago and i love checking in to see what’s going on. i can totally empathize with so much - the jdating (ugh!), the numbers game in my head, the exes getting married (i cried so much the night one of them called to tell me he was engaged)… i know it doesn’t help so much now, but i think it’ll help bring you peace and comfort in the future knowing that you made the right decision and that the right person for you is out there.
i have to say, thanks for the way you put everything in perspective and put yourself out there to voice what a lot of us are feeling.

Oh shoot, I am so late on this post! So sorry to hear that Hilary. Good things will come to such a beautiful and cool person as you.

Just catching up on your blog, Hilary. I know how hard it bites when an ex gets married. I totally do. I am thinking of you.

I am with ya. Ever since Mr. Emotionally Unavailable e-mailed me that he was getting married, I have been acting out (shopping and eating too much).

I had to blog about, but I’m not sure how to link to that. Hmmm. Let’s try this . . . http://ohblahdah.blogspot.com/2006/05/news-that-may-come-to-you-as-shock.html

Maybe we should start a support group?