You should go out with him again. I thought the same thing about the guy I’m dating now and he is perfect for me. The sparks started flying on the second date and still haven’t stopped 5 months later. Maybe he wasn’t feeling very charismatic that night? As for the second guy, think positively. If you go in with doubts they will come true. Go in thinking positively and the best will come.

was he cute?

As a fellow J-dater, all I can say is, I’m with you! And I also have to say, even if it’s unpopular and may be the exception rather than the rule, that I clicked immediately with my last two boyfriends (who I met via JDate and as opposed to “natural causes”). I’ve never had the experience of sparks flying on the 2nd date, but I know many married people who have.

Enjoy the phone date and keep us posted!

Oh, and a question: if the non-sparks guy calls and you’ve decided not to see him again, will you tell him, or just screen the call?

Glad it was at least a pleasant date! I generally think it’s worth a second date just to see…but do what you think is best. And good luck w/ Bach. #2!

Sarah and AL: Okay, so yeah, I generally think it’s worth a second date just to see also, but this time, I just KNEW. Not gonna happen. It wasn’t a horrible date by any means, but there just wasn’t any chemistry.

Elise: He was okay. I think the lack of chemistry was more from his personality than his looks.

Dori: Yes, I will definitely tell him when he calls or emails me. I have to be very polite about it, as he is applying to be a Big Brother in the organization I volunteer with, and I will see him at events.

haha! I just had to see if ‘no chemistry’ really meant ‘he’s fugly’!!!! hah, glad it doesn’t

and please make the smileys work in the comments!!!

Hah. Elise, when are you coming back to CA? And I don’t know how to make the smilies work…maybe one of my readers can help?

When you know, you know. I don’t think telling him to call was a copout–it’s nicer than saying “no thanks” right away.

Jdate is certainly an adventure, but my man (who I met on Jdate, by the way) and I have been to two weddings of couples who met on Jdate. Not too shabby. (Of course, the first couple tells everyone they met at a Cubs game, but we know the truth . . . )

Write another jdater off. I think that should be the next holiday we pass. Jdate is like an assembly line, looking for the perfect chocolate. Like the I love Lucy episode, eat em all up, get full…and eventually, you’ll find the perfect one.

Ok, that was the most horrid analogy for a teacher. LOL…but I think you know what I mean. I could end up on JDate again some day…G-d help us everyone!

Hil: As you know. I believe that a 2nd date is ALWAYS necessary…but, it looks as if I am outnumbered!!!!

Elise, you will be spending Father’s day with us on the 18th won’t you??? Hope so…..

Love,

mom

JDate is like penicillin to me right now. It tastes terrible but somehow you have to take it. It’s a means to an end I guess. A couple of weeks ago I met a great guy (and as we know they are few and far between). There are, however, a couple of minor problems: (a) he doesn’t believe in organized religion (being particularly critical of all things Jewish); and (b) he and I differ on virtually every single moral issue that has come up. I mean seriously!

Obviously not the guy for you. Working writer? Do some writers ruin their amateur stabdubg>

oh man, i could have written this post. plenty of times. the ones that i actually really like letting me down. and the ones who should be right for me, i feel no chemistry with. (or even better, seeing profiles of guys i know show up in my JDate matches…it’s like yeah, i already know we’re not a match, what does the JDate computer know!)

anyway, i know there are a lot worse things in the world i could be complaining about than trying to find mr. right, but it doesn’t mean that it’s not frustrating all the same.