Maybe he was waiting so he’d have an excuse to call you later? (That excuse being to ask you out again, naturally.)

By the way? Ted from How I Met Your Mother and I apparently have similar taste in women — we both have minor crushes on Kim Deal from The Pixies. I’m way impressed they invoked the band’s name on the show! Big ups, as the kids say.

Personally, I try to refrain from mentioning future dates while on a first one. I like to go home and process and give the other person some space too. I’m happy nobody got called an asshole this time. Yay!

I wouldn’t read Too Much into it. It sounds like you had Fun!

So, is The Cat and The Fiddle Staff going to wonder Whatever Became Of You? They probably think You Must Be In Love!

See, it wasn’t so bad! Hopefully he’ll call and if he doesn’t, no harm, no foul, because you had a pleasant evening. Now you will never wonder “what if.”

I’m with Kmeelyon. I hardly ever commit to a second date at the end of the first. And I often go on second dates. It’s just nice to get some perspective and think about how you want to handle things so that you don’t send the wrong messages about where you are. I usually then email or call within the next 1-2 days and say what a nice time I had and would they like to go out again.

Agreed. If you both had fun, one of you will follow up.

But if, for some stupid and illegitimate reason, he *isn’t* into you (because he’s in love with his cousin or something), at least he was straightforward and didn’t set unrealistic expectations.

But I bet he’ll be in touch. And go you for putting yourself out there! You deserve a treat today.

It sounds like a great date. I’m sure you’ll hear from him even though there was no mention of it. Crossing my fingers for you!

Hey H, did you know that Luke Ford called you a spinster on his blog?

Yeah I saw.

Count me with the majority. If you both had fun no reason you won’t be hearing from him again.

I don’t understand this “need to process” thing before the guy knows whether he wants another date. He must be really out of touch if he doesn’t know by the time they part. So he needs to spend a few days mulling and pondering and ruminating in order to conclude, “Gee, I had a wonderful time, but on reflection I won’t ask her out again.”??????

It’s funny how, when I’m into someone or get the feeling that he is not into me, I get all antsy about not having a second date even mentioned at the end of the first. . .however, whenever I get the kind of guy who does mention a first date at the end of the second, I’m all, “whoa, dude–back off there, dungeon master! What, you think you OWN ME?”

I am such a freaking delight to be around, I tell you.

Hey, I had my first guy picked up by The Bus this weekend!

Sounds like a nice evening. Hope he calls again.

Processing? Must be a personality type that wants to process.

I am a romantic idealist, and impetuous enough to want the good word on a second date before we hit the parking lot (or wherever goodbyes occur).

I suppose I’ve been watching too many romantic comedies, I suppose. I’ve GOT to cut down!

Just keep shooting for the moon, and hoping for a fabulous falling in love. when you least expect it.

Some reasons why a guy might not mention calling you for a 2nd date while on the first:

1.) He’s painfully shy.

2.) He’s socially inept.

3.) Some combination of 1&2.

4.) He’s a guy. He thinks fabulous women are waiting to date him all over town. (They are, but only in his dreams or on select DVD collections).

5.) He heard the bus warming up, and it scared the bejebus out of him.

6.) Too busy at work to commit to even a fleeting relationship.

7.) Looked deep into your eyes, saw his own reflection, and wondered why on earth did he ever have to leave his apartment just knowing how absolutely fabulous he looked.

8.) Having serious issues with his hair care products this month. Call back later.

9.) Is carless in LA.

10.) Secretly either carless, jobless or homeless, or some combo of the 3.

Cheers & Good Luck! ‘VJ’

Ah, the happy exception that proves the rule. Don’t plan on this:

http://nyobserver.com/20060515/20060515_Daisy_Carrington_love_thelovebeat-2.asp

Relax. And line up some more guys to date. If you have two dozen prospects in the sales funnel, one is bound to get stuck.

@ptwelve - dating is expensive and the ROI is terrible. Damn straight I’m going to spend some time processing!

Congrats on a nice evening! Those are hard to come by in the LA dating scene.

Monday - Thursday with no posts? what’s up hil?

I’m with Jason — generally I won’t ask a girl out on a second date while on the first date. Unless there is smooching and I’m totally smitten, then might risk a “When can i see you again?” But in general you don’t want to come off as over-eager.

And yeah, find more prospects!